Rum and Coke BBQ Pulled Pork

Actually Measured:

1 medium-ish boneless rib end pork roast (or whatever roasty cut you prefer, with a bit of fat for flavour)
1 bottle Heinz(tm) chili sauce
2 cans cola (I wouldn't go with Pepsi(tm), too sweet; I use Coke(tm))
1 medium-ish onion
2 carrots
1-3 chipotles in adobo (mmmmm)
2 limes

Holistically Measured:

garlic powder
onion powder
black pepper
salt
cumin (ground)
coreander (ground)
dark chinese soya sauce
dark rum (I love the Cap'n)

Equipment:

crock pot (big enough to hold it all)
spoon
tongs
fork
bowl (fer mixin!)
knife
cutting surface
glass

Prep time: 20 minutes if you have too much of step 1
Cook time: 12 hours (frozen roast); some number of hours for fresh meat.

Directions:

1) make yourself a rum and coke using one of the cans. Is that how much rum you normally like? Good, we're going to use a bit more than that for this recipe.

2) chunk onion, slice carrot. chuck into bottom of crock pot

3) nestle roast on top, pet it, call it George

4) in bowl: put in spices, bottle of chili sauce (yes the whole thing), mix it around a bit. If you're feeling adventurous, sprinkle extra spices on George; he'll like it, I promise.

5) juice limes, add to red mix; finely dice the chipotles, pick as many as volunteer for the project, remembering that the more the spicier; add to red mix to make it redder.

6) pour on soya sauce, enough to make the red sauce slightly change colour, whatever floats your boat

7) pour in some rum, more than you added to your rum and coke. If I were honest, I would admit to adding around 1/3 to 1/2 a cup. stir this in.

8) carefully add the other can of coke. this can get super fizzy and will look horrible, please trust it's there for a reason: awesome flavour. stir carefully.

9) pour over George, look at him revel, don't drool in the pot.

10) put crock pot on over low heat, for a good long while. My roast was frozen when I did this, and I let it go overnight (total 12 hours) and this was the juciest I've ever had it, and the most flavourful. Probably want to use less time if you start with raw meat. I'd say check shreddability at 3 then 6 hours. Meat should fall apart like similarly charged objects and feel succulent and juicy on the palette.

Serve with favourite form of carbohydrate.

Nom!

Please comment with any suggestions or updates! especially if you hit the perfect time for an unfrozen roast.